3.23.2011

Cutting

I cut a lot last night after a huge purge.
Why do I always do this to myself? I'll lose three pounds, get a little bit happy with myself, and start eating normally. Then, I'll gain it all back in a week and purge. Then, I lose three pounds again... and the cycle never ends.
Or, at least, that's how it is when I don't have a scale to check myself.
But THANKFULLY, I found it, and I'll be staying on track for a while.

Back to the cutting.
It was a knife, a real knife, but an awfully rigid one. It wasn't the sharpest, but it definitely drew blood from my thighs and wrists.
Urgh. That word. Wrists. It sounds so... so crazy/gross/hopeless. It's depressing to say, really. I didn't actually realize how abnormal it is to draw your own blood until I wrote that.
Huh.

No comments:

Post a Comment